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  • Writer's pictureSeth Eric Springer, Esq.

What Can You Not Do During A Divorce?

The process of divorce can be a vulnerable and emotional time. Moreover, the ex-couple should avoid some mistakes that may worsen the situation. The following are some things that both parties should not do during a divorce.

What You Should Not Do During A Divorce

What You Should Not Do During A Divorce

Never take legal advice from the other spouse or opposing counsel

The petitioner must not communicate with their spouse’s legal team or attorney. Instead, they should leave it to their attorney.

Don’t cheat, lie or steal

Since it is a legal proceeding, the spouse should not do anything shifty, unlawful, and suspicious. It is necessary to tell the attorney everything, including infidelity, addiction, and adultery.

Both parties should not sell off the jewelry of their spouse. They should also not destroy or fabric evidence. It is also not advisable to hide, lie or sugarcoat the truth. In the divorce process, each spouse should not submit false information in affidavits, pleading, or statements. The couple should not attempt to mislead the court or lie under oath. If they don’t want to destroy their credibility, they need to be honest. Thus, the judge can rule against them and hold them in contempt.

Never send nasty emails or text messages to the spouse

If one of the spouses doesn’t want to be a bad parent or appear unstable and cruel, they need to avoid sending nasty messages to the other spouse.

Don’t stalk or spy on the spouse

During the divorce process, one of the parties should not spy or stalk his or her spouse. Never track their iPhone and their communications.

Never post on social media

Posting online can be used against a spouse in court. Therefore, both parties should not post about their lawyers, case, or judge. If possible, the spouses should stay offline until after the divorce.

Never date

The spouses shouldn’t be involved in any sexual or romantic relationship during the divorce. They should put their kids first. Dating can weaken the spouse’s bargaining position in negotiations with respect to a fault. Moreover, a fault is a big factor in determining alimony.

Don’t take another debt

The spouses need to focus on the divorce cost and avoid unnecessary spending. The divorce process costs money. Experts and attorneys can cost money. With that, the couple should avoid another debt. The process has many costs, including mental health professionals, forensic accountants, independent child custody evaluators, and mediators. Who pays for the divorce must be financially responsible.

Don’t avoid counseling

Divorce is a very stressful experience. It can result in poor judgment and depression.

Alcohol and drugs can make the situation worse. Counseling and therapy can be helpful for those who suffer from these difficult times. The couple can listen to the advice and opinion of the people they respect and trust.

Don’t get pregnant or never get anyone pregnant

With pregnancy, the proceedings may expand to parenting plans, child custody, and child support. It can also lead the spouse to lose grounds for the divorce.

Never badmouth the spouse to the children

Bad mouthing an ex-spouse can be bad for both parties and to their children. It is not good to badmouth the spouse and force the kids to choose sides. If one spouse is angry or upset, they can talk to a lawyer instead of the kids.

Don’t refuse in negotiating in good faith

The spouses should not refuse to settle out of spite, principle, or disgust. Each spouse can understand their spouse’s financial picture before finding their settlement position. Each party should take it reasonably and seriously since settlement can affect their financial future. This is especially the case if you desire to divorce your wife and keep everything.

The spouse should not do this by herself or himself

The divorce takes time and is a difficult process. Legal advice from a no contest divorce lawyer in York can avoid serious problems and mistakes from happening. It is crucial to choose an attorney to handle the divorce case carefully. The lawyer is the person that the spouse relies on to protect his or her interests in times of emotional distress.

Never use children as tools for revenge

It is not good to use the children to get back at the other spouse. Both parties should not take out their kids’ anxiety, frustrations, anger, or hurt.


Generally, the spouses should avoid the things mentioned above to worsen the divorce situation.

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